So Halloween was a couple of days ago.

I got home from work, grabbed the candy I had bought, and went downstairs to sit on the front porch and wait for trick-or-treaters to go by. AH! There's one right away! It's her first Halloween! Gee, I wonder why she's a bit scared by the whole premise of taking candy from strangers??? No wonder we're all so confused all the time.

Success! She takes a "fun size" M&Ms. My friend Paul questions why this is a "fun" size. Wouldn't a fun size be gigantic? A two-pound M&M? Mmmmmm...

But, alas. No one else comes for candy. It's only a little after 5 p.m., though. Probably people hit the streets at 6 or so. I run upstairs, fiddle around, and run downstairs to check the scene on the street. I run upstairs; I run downstairs. Run Paul run. See Paul run. Run run run.

It's about 6 p.m. now, and I leave a little Happy Halloween note next to the candy sitting on the porch just in case I miss somebody. I run upstairs one more time to grab my coat because I'm going over to a friend's house. I run back downstairs five minutes later. GASP!!! Someone has made off with all of "my" Halloween candy that I was going to give away anyway!!!

C'mon with me now and resist the old-man-on-the-porch-temptation to say, "What's this world coming to?"

...

ARRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

WHAT'S THIS WORLD COMING TO???!!!

I was sad. Perhaps not as much as this screaming fit would indicate. But get this: I would have been less sad if someone had stolen it later on in the evening, after other people would have had a chance to score some candy. But I got exactly what I expected could happen, so I'm not really that sad. Would I have acted differently during those impressionable years? If I were accompanied by an adult, yes. Definitely not if we're talking freshman year of college, though. Heh.

So enjoy that candy, neighbors! Even share it with your friends! Your world is coming to a cavity.